shadow monster

shadow monster let me be

you think you are helping

your grip digs into my skin

let go for a minute

step into the light

let me see your face

i thought you’d be a monster

but i see it now

you’re the part of me deprived of grace

step into the light

let me see your face

you are just a part of me

that i have yet to embrace

it’s a shame you are

(always right behind me)

it’s a shame you are

(hiding in the darkness)

it’s a shame you are

My body could viscerally feel this “shadow monster” pulling my arms back, trying to keep me from moving forward and putting myself out there in new ways and sometimes even the old ways. I thought it was something I needed to shake off but as I took a closer look (though it barely let me), I saw a small scared version of myself trying to protect me from embarrassment.

She was my shame.

I had made this timid part of myself into a monster instead of embracing her. I let her know the bravery of becoming my truest self is worth risking embarassment.

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