mother hunger

I think I just forgave you

This feeling like a weight lifted off me

I see you as you are and choose to love

It didn’t feel like a choice really

More of a lifting up my head to the sun

Seeing the soft tide of the morning ocean

Gently rise and fall like my breath

In with grace, out with distain

In with peace, out with hate

I’ve hated you a long time

My whole self tightening in your presence

Resisting you like the plague

Afraid I would catch your disease

And my children would hate me too

I picture you

Small and tender

Wide eyes full of wonder

Open arms in search of love

I picture you

Always asking questions

Sometimes only in your mind

You didn’t feel safe

Living the paradox of fear and protection

Nourishing me from cracked jars

What does a soul do when it’s been mishandled

How long has this pain been repeated

Again the starved lovers are holding their child

Each precious vessel then broken

Generation upon the next

But there is remedy flowing

A glistening balm for despair

The tears on the floor are now golden

Love that has shattered repaired

Beauty and strength so surprising

When gravity takes its death toll

The drop that seems meant for destruction

Is somehow the means for the mend

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