mother hunger
I think I just forgave you
This feeling like a weight lifted off me
I see you as you are and choose to love
It didn’t feel like a choice really
More of a lifting up my head to the sun
Seeing the soft tide of the morning ocean
Gently rise and fall like my breath
In with grace, out with distain
In with peace, out with hate
I’ve hated you a long time
My whole self tightening in your presence
Resisting you like the plague
Afraid I would catch your disease
And my children would hate me too
I picture you
Small and tender
Wide eyes full of wonder
Open arms in search of love
I picture you
Always asking questions
Sometimes only in your mind
You didn’t feel safe
Living the paradox of fear and protection
Nourishing me from cracked jars
What does a soul do when it’s been mishandled
How long has this pain been repeated
Again the starved lovers are holding their child
Each precious vessel then broken
Generation upon the next
But there is remedy flowing
A glistening balm for despair
The tears on the floor are now golden
Love that has shattered repaired
Beauty and strength so surprising
When gravity takes its death toll
The drop that seems meant for destruction
Is somehow the means for the mend
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